I'm going to be eighteen.
I'm going to trust people.
I'm going to respect myself.
I'm going to take depression meds.
I'm going to quit most drugs.
I'm going to have a healthy sex life.

I'm not going to isolate myself.
I'm not going to disappear for weeks.
I'm not going to hate everyone.
I'm not going to eat much.
I'm not going to limit myself.

I want to meet someone.
Who I can tell.

What happened.

And when I tell them,
I'm not going to laugh this time.

I'm going to......
Be vulnerable.

I don't know if anyone sees me like that.
Everyone puts themselves below me.
Everyone thinks I'm so strong and brilliant.
Everyone trusts everything I say.
And they take my advice like it's gold.

I don't understand why they think I'm special.

I think.


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