The memories smack my face.
And it all comes in a huge rush of disgusted pain.
And I'm flooding myself.
Wherever I may be.
Suffocating in all of it.
Like an attack, it calms after the climax.
And the tears dry.
And I forget.
And I don't care about what happened.
I am distant.


A slip that I commit.
Oh no, melting into grit.
I splish and I splash.
Everything flies and attacks.

Remember the days of suck it in.
I thought for a second that I could win.
Yet I find myself here in something so grim.

Can't you please just listen and
Suck it in.
Suck it in.
Can't you please.
Let me win.
Suck it in.
Am I meant to be a mess.
Or am I meant to catch the spin.
And stomp upon all that bothers me.
I want the power that isn't inside of me.
Suck it in.
Let me win.
Utopia brings the gluttony that spins the spin.


I'll slave in the heat.
And freeze in the cold.
I've got to groove to my beat.
To New York I must go.