And I just feel like.
And I know that it's a phase.
But this phase is very long.
And I am over it.
And I know it's because of the repressed memories that came about.
And the acceptance of what else happened as something that really happened.
And also the fact that the love that I had didn't love me so.
And didn't want me so.
And here I am.
And squeezed dry from a long relationship.
I am empty inside.
I don't know anyone well enough to feel comfortable.
It's not that I want Bryce here specifically.
But I want the awesome situation that I had with Bryce.
I am asexual.
And everyone calls me that.
And I don't want anyone.
Last night, Sahara slept with Austin.
And I was left with Zack.
Who is such a nice boy.
And went to a weird program like me.
And we smoked together.
But I left.
I saw how the situation was going.
But I am not such of a person.
I am an empty person.
A sexually soulless person.
Don't ever want to be disrespected or used again.
And I know that's not reality.
I will be.
Because life is long.
It's bound to happen again.
But I'm not going to let that be the way that I re integrate.
I want to.
Receive what I deserve.
I am alone with myself.