16.12.14

11:20 pm 10/12/14

I was already drinking by myself,
But I ran away to a bar in order to surround myself with babylovin’.
But the second i show up, she just says his name over and over again.
And she feels more excitement than I do .
I’m at this point where the sweetness is giving me fear of rotting teeth.
I don’t want to tell them about it.
I don’t know what to say.
It’s something that is occurring in my life, and it’s cool.
But I don’t know what to tell them.
I feel like she’s a little uncomfortable because we used to be the soulless ones together while everyone else fell in love.
And though that might not necessarily be the statement that I’m claiming,
I’m not cold with her no longer.
I haven’t wanted to be
She’s uncomfortable.
I'm uncomfortable.
Because everyone is staring at my dimples and thinks that they have as deep of a meaning as deep as they cave into my face.
I just don’t know what to tell them.
I’m in a surreal stance within my life.
And I’m letting it float and float until it let’s me know what’s going on.
So I smoke my cigarette walking home after chugging as much booze as I could in one moment.
With a failed attempt to leave my mind.
Only to find myself engulfed.

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